24 Hours- I’m OK and you’re OK

October 10, 2009 at 2:38 pm (Running) (, , )

I will admit it. When I left work to stay home with the kids, I thought I could do it better. Better than my husband did, better than my mother, better than quite a few mamas I know (although I know a lot of great mamas- at least as good as them).  I had high aspirations.  My kids would be happier, because I’d consistently help them work through their difficulties, and they would in turn be so emotionally fulfilled by this guidance and my attention that all fighting would cease.  Our bottom line would improve, even though I wasn’t working, because I’d frugally shop for healthy foods and make meals from scratch.  And save even more by making other items to our exact style and size specifications- clothing, curtains, laundry soap.  Our home would be clean, organized, and inviting.  Hahahaha.

Here’s what I’ve realized.  And it’s not earth-shattering.  Everybody has the same amount of time each day.  Nobody has enough.  And no one can do it all.  Not that lady with the perfect smart well-adjusted kids and perfect style that suits just them.  Not the woman that is well-spoken and up on current events, so much so I don’t dare try to talk to her, as my world has recently gotten smaller, not bigger.

But everybody’s cutting corners somewhere.

Some people are better at hiding where than others.

I know a woman who cuts a giant corner off her own sleep.  Women who all but cut out cooking.  Others cut a social life, spending time with their kids, or having any kids at all.  *Some people don’t spend any time on the internet.*  Shock.

I’ve been taking joy in finding people’s corners.  I know, I know, it’s not healthy.  But some people just seem so perfect.  It’s those people I quietly jealousize, and then they say, “I haven’t taken any pictures of Susan since last Christmas.”  Or, “We never really go to the park.”  And I think, “Oh, she isn’t perfect.”  EVERYBODY has a corner.  They have to.

What any person spends their time on demonstrates their value system.  Whether they are intentional about it or not.  It’s easy to let time go to waste, watching tv.  Or my time waster- googling random inconsequential things.

I, it’s become obvious, take corners with the care of my house.  I really do want a house where a friend can stop by, and not have to trip over toys to come into the kitchen for a cup of coffee.  And I wouldn’t have to cringe if the friend heads to the bathroom, because she may step on cat litter and find mildew in the bowl.  But this house I do not have.

Right now it’s the corner I’m taking.  A giant big dirty disgusting corner.  That and plently other little ones.  It’s less important to me than my kids, or my sleep, or my food.  To me.  And that’s ok.  Your own corner, whatever it is, is ok too.

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6 Comments

  1. Jessica said,

    Oh, I so needed to read that! I’m glad others take joy in discovering people’s corners, too. And to know that everyone has them — what a relief!

  2. I know you’ve been on the edge of your seats « JaRuuds said,

    […] Cleaning (0.24 hours)- See, I told you this is my corner. […]

  3. I don’t know how you do it « JaRuuds said,

    […] It’s a woman thing, maybe, or at least a Mom Thing.  I’ve said before I do it by cutting corners. Everybody does, what varies is the corner.  To hide the corners or […]

  4. Mrs. G. said,

    I don’t think I’ve ever made anyone envious of my domestic or time management skills. Too true, this post.

  5. trash said,

    You sum it up perfectly. I had never realised before but they are corners and we do cut them and everyone’s have different stuff in them.

  6. kcinnova said,

    Laid back housekeeping is a skill I have “perfected” (ha!) to help others not feel so uptight about their own messes… probably because mine is usually worse. Yes, that is definitely my corner (and the internet, reading blogs).

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